literature

To whom I was, one year ago

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Literature Text

Dear Stephanie,

It's the time of year where the line between present and future is faint and I am able to share my thoughts with you from the future. It's not all good, but it's not all bad, I guess the past year has been the best I've had in a long time so try to put a smile upon the pretty face of yours, the worst is over, but in saying that I still have a long journey ahead to find all the pieces of me. I still haven't worked out who I am and the future is not very clear. Though you can relax I am in a better situation than you are now and I have the faith we'll cross over the rainbow and find our happy ending some where in the future, even though you stopped believing in fairy tales long ago. There has to be a reason for all of these challenges.

"Hurry up, I already know all this!" I hear you say,
you really need more patience when it comes to reading these letters not everybody gets clues to what the future holds for them. Although I understand this is the highlight of the next few months, when your life is staying up and sleeping in until noon, daytime television of Dr Phil and Judge Judy and staying up all night trying to use your creativity but your fighting with a wall of self doubt and lack of motivation that comes from not having any structure or routine, lets face it unemployment  does nothing for your self esteem, especially when you keep trying to get back into the work force but the doors just won't open for you. Anyway you want to know what I'm doing now so I'll tell you but take note of any advice I give you.

I'll start with the bad news, right now I am still dealing with the humiliations and frustrations that go with unemployment, yep that's right still no job.. so don't get too excited about learning to drive, the prospects of moving out of home with friends, not to mention travelling overseas, we're still a long way from achieving any of those dreams. However go ahead and treat yourself to spending what little you have saved up on concert tickets, it's true in a mosh pit you can forget your troubles and it is the one place you feel truly alive and happy.

However, on that note we did have a job this year although it only lasted six weeks this time, the shortest job yet for us. If I could give you advice on keeping the job I would but once again it wasn't us, you were let go because there wasn't enough customers and although you were not the last person employed, you were the first to go because the other girl was related to other staff and way younger so it cost them less. Quite simply the first weekend in October when you feel really sick and want to spend the weekend in bed, don't bother forcing yourself to go to work, it doesn't really matter if your absence lets the team down, they'll just call you on Monday and tell you, your services are no longer required anyway.

For now just do as your best friend said and concentrate on study, because there has to be a bigger plan for us... you know she's awesome right!! And it is these words I keep holding on too. What's that? You want me to back up a little, you're eyes are stuck on the word study. No it was not a typo, we are in fact studying. Congratulations you are the first person in your immediate family to attend university. I don't think I've told you how proud I am of you, when life throws you curve balls you turn them into home runs and university is the best decision we have made in an extremely long time, so continue your research as I know you are contemplating the idea now and go ahead and study creative writing, if nothing else it will get you out of the house and your marks are really good too, but I won't tell you how good, I want you to do the very best you can and I fear if you know, you may be less inclined to try as hard.

However, research further before you fork out the money for the mature age entry test and the preparation classes, your advanced diploma from technical college meets the entry requirements, so relax and just fill out the application that is an order. You will enjoy the entire experience and believe it or not you will fit right in, people will actually like you just the way you are, I'm not saying you'll make lots of friends but you will have many acquaintances which make classes enjoyable and everyone has a different timetable so hanging out alone on breaks is normal. It's not awkward at all and you'll find yourself walking around campus with confidence in no time as soon as you find your classrooms.

As for your hermit crabs, however spend as much time with the little guys as you can and say hello for me, they'll be gone by this time next year but on the plus I currently have a bigger tank and nine hermit crabs in total, who continue to brighten my day. Even though there is no plus side for losing Benji and Joel, I know.

Enough of the bad good things await you. Soundwave festival will be a blast, although more fun once you move off on your own rather than be a third wheel, Good Charlotte will be a long seven hour wait but second row of the mosh pit in front of Benji Madden is worth the wait. WICKED the musical is amazing I still can't get over the flying monkeys and their costumes. Counter Revolution aside from losing your job on the way was awesome front of the mosh for so many bands you love. Foo Fighters rocked too although take lots of warm clothes considering it was the end of November it was unseasonally cold and pouring with rain. Not to forget by the end of the year you will be a guest at a wedding, yes we finally get to go to a wedding after all those funerals. Speaking of which we did go to one, try to get your mother to go visit her uncle Arthur, she will regret not seeing him in a long time when it's too late.

I wish you well on your journey through the following year and some of what you are about to experience I am jealous of because I cannot time travel back to take part with you, which is strange considering I am you, keep on keeping on and who knows perhaps this time next year you will be hearing wonderful things that right now we can only imagine. Let's keep it positive. I don't tell you enough I always talk you down and say really mean things to you but I'm sorry, I'm our own worst enemy.

Love always,
The future You

P.S please exercise a little more and don't feed your emotions with junk food quite so much, I am tired of buying new clothes because the old ones don't fit and I want to still be able to fit into our pretty pink jacket.
Written for the :iconletters-to-myself: write a letter to your younger selves competition...

This year, I couldn't figure out how to make it creative, so I decided to keep it simple and just write to the me of one year ago dishing out advice on the year ahead, as the past year has held lots of changes for me =)
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